5 Practical Ways to Love Your Family in Troubled Times

How can we help our kids and grandkids face these troubled times with faith-filled optimism and courage?

Raising happy, healthy children has never been more challenging. How can we do it? How can we help our kids and grandkids face these troubled times with faith-filled optimism and courage? Let me suggest five principles from God’s Word.

1. Provide for your family – 1 Timothy 5:8

It’s no accident that the Bible refers to God as our Father. Not only does Father describe His true character and nature, but it also points to Him as the perfect example for us to follow. It’s remarkable how many times the fatherhood of God is placed alongside human fatherhood in the New Testament to illustrate how we, as parents, can love our children. And one way we do that, according to the book of Timothy, is by providing for our families. “If anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8).

With each child that enters the family, it’s a reminder that God has given parents the incredible privilege and opportunity to provide for their families. Looking back over the years and remembering the ways God has enabled us to meet our family’s needs is a joyful, worshipful experience.

Looking back over the years and remembering the ways God has enabled us to meet our family’s needs is a joyful, worshipful experience.

Just as we want to provide for our children, God wants to provide for us. He’s not a reluctant Father who needs to be convinced to do what we want; He is a willing Father who is eager to answer our requests. The book of Matthew offers a parallel story of God the Father and human fatherhood:

Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him! (Matthew 7:9-11)

The Bible tells us that God is waiting for us to ask Him for what we need. In this same chapter, we find these familiar words: “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened” (verses 7-8). While it is true that He has wired this universe to work through prayer, God simply says, “If you ask, I will answer. If you seek, I will be found. If you knock, the door will be opened.” That attitude of anticipation by our Heavenly Father should be the spirit we have as parents—not reluctant, but eager and willing to help our children.

2. Teach your children to be godly – 1 Samuel 2 & 3

The COVID-19 pandemic required many families to shelter in place together for weeks and even months. Some caregivers welcomed this extra time with their children. Others discovered what their children’s teachers had been telling them for a long time—their kids are wild! As much as we might like to point fingers at the teachers or the kids themselves, God’s Word places responsibility squarely on the parents.

Hebrews 12:6 says, “For the Lord disciplines those he loves” (NLT). That’s a good word, isn’t it? Although most would never admit it, children feel more secure in an environment hemmed in by well-thought-out boundaries. On the other hand, allowing kids to run wild doesn’t prepare them for success in life or God’s kingdom. One of the most loving things we can do for our children is to help them make the right decisions.

Our goal in administering discipline is to encourage godliness.

The writer of Hebrews explains that discipline allows us to share in God’s holiness and to enjoy “the fruit of righteousness” (Hebrews 12:11). Our goal in administering discipline is to encourage godliness. It is not an opportunity to vent our anger. It’s not because “these kids are driving me crazy!” It’s because we love our children too much to allow them to develop sinful habits that will lead them away from God’s will and the promise of His blessing.

3. Respond with compassion – Psalm 103:13-14

Parents and other caregivers express love to their children by providing for them and disciplining them, but they are also responsible for responding with compassion. The goal of correction is to help young people be their personal best, not perfect. Psalm 103:13-14 states, “The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust” (NLT).

The apostle Paul adds, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Our correction should be constructive, not destructive. Godly discipline cultivates good attitudes in our children and encourages them.

When raising kids, there’s a fine line between maintaining the standard of what is right and understanding that they’re growing—they’re immature and need grace. We don’t always do that well. That wasn’t the way many of us were brought up. Along with all the rules and standards, it’s essential to find a balance—and to have fun too.

4. Recognize their individuality – Genesis 49:28

One habit of great parents is that they study their children. Genesis 49 records Jacob’s blessing to each of his twelve sons. He didn’t give a blanket statement; he provided something special for every single person in his family.

Occasionally, a parent blurts out, “Why can’t you be like your brother,” or “Why can’t you be like your sister?” The obvious answer is that each child is a different person. God has created each of our children uniquely. Some of them are athletes, others are musicians, and some are into all kinds of different hobbies. And the most significant thing we can do is to love, nurture, shape, and know them. Encouraging kids to express their God-given uniqueness is one way we prepare them to step out into this wide world.

Encouraging kids to express their God-given uniqueness is one way we prepare them to step out into this wide world.

As nurturers, our job is to learn about the children in our life. Each of them has their own personality and abilities because each of them is unique. We can set children free to be the people God created them to be if we will help them find their strengths, gifts, and talents. Then, we celebrate them for who they are and help them become everything God wants them to be.

5. Reinforce their identity – Colossians 3:21

When John the Baptist baptized Jesus, the Bible says a voice from heaven proclaimed, “This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased” (Matthew 3:17). What a great statement! I don’t think there’s anything that we can do for our kids, especially in this generation, that’s more important than being their cheerleaders.

When my kids were growing up, I committed to supporting them and encouraging them by being physically present at their activities. My son, David, played high school basketball, and his games were often in the afternoon. So I would take off early and go to his matches. I hardly missed any. But every time I turned around, my commitment was tested.

Periodically, our priorities come in conflict with each other. And sometimes our kids need to take precedence over everybody else.

One day as I was preparing to leave for a game, I could tell my secretary was having a hard time with someone who wanted to talk to me about a personal crisis he was experiencing. He just kept after her. Finally, she said, “No, Dr. Jeremiah can’t see you. He’s already late for an appointment. He’s leaving, and he can’t see you right now.”

To exit the building, I had to walk through the lobby. And there he was. The man walked right up to me and said, “Where are you going?” When I explained that I was on the way to my son’s basketball game, he threw a fit. At that moment, God gave me a word, and here’s what I said: “Sir, there are five guys upstairs who are pastors who can help you. My son only has one dad, and I’m out of here.” Then I left.

I trust that man found the help he needed. His needs were important and valid. But periodically, our priorities come in conflict with each other. And sometimes our kids need to take precedence over everybody else.

That’s how we raise resilient kids who are prepared to face the World of the End. And we don’t do it right all the time. But when we see our young people living out their faith, it is a beautiful thing. Parenthood is more caught than taught, and our kids catch it when they see it happen. Let’s do everything we can to cheer them on to greatness.

¹ Sarah Cottrell, “A Year-by-Year Guide to Different Generations and Their Personalities,” Parents, June 28, 2022, https://www.parents.com/parenting/better-parenting/style/generation-names-and-years-a-cheat-sheet-for-parents/, accessed on September 1, 2022.

²“Children and Depression,” Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/depression/children-and-depression, accessed on September 1, 2022.